It had been a strange feeling spending a night away from the city. She probably would never get used to such a thing, but the quiet had allowed to do things she never thought she ever would again.

Like the almost finished metallic cylinder beside her.

Like the almost calm feeling she had.

Like the meditation she was making now. The first unbidden by Cartess or N'Tresni in over a decade.


Sitting cross legged, hands resting on her knees, she let her consciousness drift to where it needed to be . . .



--

Asking for Cartess, but open to anyone with access to the Shack.

Drifting like a wave over a vast sea of memory, Sholua felt the energies of the world around here- darker than most places in her history but so was much of the galaxy. Here, however, there was a reprieve from the heavy darkness which infects the city itself. Allowing herself to ride the wave her consciousness drifts along, finding a peaceful rest until she catches direction. As she follows this direction she's met with the flashing of emotions rather than images, a birth of a new life, a departure, suffering and then solitude. This solitude takes hold for a long time with the mixing of a small friend of white which appears to her like a small moving ball of fuzz along the backdrop. It brings companionship for many turns of the planet. As the days grow weaker, the sense begins to drift, attention is directed toward a darker place and the reminder of that birth once more.

Sholua sees the resting of an old man set atop a fire in the darkness. All around the feeling of living beings but one steps forward, a woman with brown hair tied back who steps forward and places a flower atop the body. After speaking a few words the fires light and the body burns, releasing what remains of the connection she feels into the air above the village and then the swamp. Drifting apart until she feels, in her heart, the presence of the living force.

Opening her eyes she sees Cartess across from her, eyes closed in meditation. Distinctly she knows she's awake by the smell of breakfast being cooked nearby and the sound of Kira dropping something metal against the ground- a swear quickly following.

"It has been too long . . . "

She shook her head and turned to see what Kira had dropped.

"Need a hand with anything?"

"No!- no," she grumbled to herself, leaning down and picking up the implement. Tossing it aside into a bucket of other dirtied implements. "Just got butter-hands this morning," she shifted, her side visible just beyond a wall where she was focused on a counter-top, a stove. With a little movement from her there was a sizzle against a pan.

Poking her head around the side, "Sorry, didn't mean to disturb," she said with a side-smile.

"I think I was done anyway. At least I smelled the food before I heard the clang. It's been . . . some time since I did this. It's going to take some time to get used to it again."

She stood slowly.

"Even longer to figure out what it meant."

"Well.." she glances to Cartess beyond Sholua, shrugs, "Tess probably would be able to help. Seems she's a bit indisposed at the moment though so.." she leans back around the side, a small clattering as she searches through her things. "Kriff-yea, I do," she chuckles, "I've got some plates here- and even a table set up. Wanna help me put out breakfast?"

"Sure."

She stepped forward with the speed and agility associated with Form IV managed to grab the plates out from under the other utensils without adding any more to the floor. She then helped Kira set things out.

Cartess will be ready when she's ready. Gotta get used to the Jedi doing things when they think it's right again. Patience . . . . ugh.

Working through the motions for a minute Kira gave some space, letting them settle into roles of a sort. "So.." she broke the brief silence, "that vision of yours or whatever. What was it like?"

"It has been a long time since I communed with the Force. Not that I did it much anyway. Master N'Tresni and I were on the frontlines too much for much more than battle meditation."

She took a breath.

"But today . . . no images at first. Just feelings. Like following someone's life. A birth, then someone leaving, which caused pain and a long stint of loneliness. Another life joined. Not a person. An animal I think. A companion that was nothing but friendly and always in the background. Time marched on and the life began to dwell on the past. On that initial birth I felt."

She paused for a moment, collecting thoughts.

"Then the images came. An old man atop a funeral pyre. I can feel but not see the crowd of lives gathered to witness, but I only see one. A woman who steps forward to lay a flower on the body. She speaks, but the words are lost to me and then the pyre is lit. The feelings of the life I have followed rise up in to the air above a village, here on Bellionas, and then disperse into the air above and over the swamp. Then there was nothing but the Force around me . . . "

She smiled at Kira.

". . . and the smell of breakfast cooking just before you dropped whatever that was."

"Maybe a giant metal spoon crashed down on the village and squashed everyone?" she said, a brief chuckle and shake of her head. It was a silly suggestion and she certainly knew it. Looking inward a moment her expression settled, "Sounds.. beautiful though, in a way. Getting to experience things like that. Tess always used to tell me a lot about her teachings, but that changed with the war too."

"There's a farm out in the swamp though.." she said, after another moments thought. "Maybe there might be something there you'll recognize from the vision? Key into something like a connection of some kind?" she suggested as the sound of Cartess stirring from her meditation could be heard from the other room.

"I only saw two faces. The old man and the woman with the flower and . . . . ahhhh I'm not good with this. Never had a vision that meant anything in the past."

She turned back to see if Cartess was with them yet.

"Unless you count just knowing which part of a spider droid to attack first."

"Never liked dealing with those myself," Cartess said with a brief smile as she walked around into the same area as them. Taking a moment to smell the breakfast.

"I'm glad everyone is getting along," she says, looking between Kira and Sholua. "Have you had any more luck?"

"A vision. It has been so long, but nothing like anything I have experienced before."

She went on to explain the vision as she saw it, as she had to Kira.

As Sholua explained again they all sat to start working on their breakfast. While they are Cartess mulls over the vision and what it could mean.

"I have.. an idea, but I'm not certain. I agree with Kira though, actually," she smiled briefly. "I think to understand your vision more we should journey to this Hard-Head farm and see what comes of it."

She nodded.

"Tomorrow then? I have some commitments today, to the ship crew."

"Tomorrow," Cartess agreed. Kira chimes in with that smile, "I'm coming too. Wanna see what all this stuff is about," she chuckled.

Sholua nodded and pushed back her now empty plate.

"The saber is as finished as it can be without a crystal."

She glanced at it lying next to where she had been meditating.

"Never thought I'd be making one of those again, or thinking about remaking this."

She took the locket from around her neck and opened it to look at the ashes and remains of her long since cut and burnt padawan braid.

Looking to Sholua Cartess followed a thought before replying, "It's.. an interesting feeling," she said with a brief smile. "Returning.. even a little. For many years I was lost in myself, and ashamed somewhat that I still had my lightsaber at the time I did things that weren't.. becoming of what we once were supposed to be. But.. here we are."

"I've done a lot that the Masters would not have approved of. I will probably continue to do so. Habits of a decade are hard to change quickly."

She closed the locket.

"I had no reason to change until now."

"You will.. but together, those of us that remain will find a way to move forward," she says, that earnest smile of hers being worn despite the bit of pain it tries best to hide.