Visiting Hours Closing Soon (D10, EE. Mando-Safehouse)

[Raven Cadera]

One more person had inquired to her state of being, and thusly been invited over to the safehouse after informing them that she wouldn't be fighting tonight.

And Raven had been considerate enough to do it after the others had been over for dinner, as she knew it was good to not crowd the place too much.

For now she was resting on the couch with the cat curled up on her chest, as she was trying to read something on her datapad.

[Deonis Harik]

Her peace would be disturbed by the visitor that inquired about her health as firm metal on metal knocks came to the door.

[Raven Cadera]

As no one else was around to answer the door immediately, Raven carefully scooped the cat off her chest as she managed to rise without the use of her arms (the good arm being busy holding a sleeping kitten). "... yes, it's not like I'm injured and in recovery over here," she remarked mostly to herself as she walked to the door.

After a quick look through the peep-hole, the door was opened for Deonis. "Hey, you still live. Nice of you to drop by our temporary abode. Come on in."

[Deonis Harik]

Deonis stood kitted out for battle full armor on, sword on his back and saber on his hip "You still live as well. I heard you got roughed up. Wanted to see how you were." He said simply voice modulated by the helmet.

He accepted her invitation, as he moved there was a very subtle mechanical whirring that accompanied his movements. As he entered he pulled off his helmet and regarded her with yellow eyes that glowed ever so slightly which was new to her "how are you Raven?"

[Raven Cadera]

"Eh, I've been worse." Bandaged arm was the first indicator, and it was mostly hanging by her side as she showed care not to move it much. The next being her breathing seeming shallow.

The fact that she was in just a plain t-shirt and combat-pants probably meant her armor had taken the worst of it. "Fractured ribs, busted arm. I'll be fine. Just not in a condition to fight, I think even Dhel could clock me today if she put effort into it." Her laugh was short and brief, gesturing for Deonis to make himself comfortable in the common area where there were plenty of chairs and couches to choose from.

The Mandalorian safehouse was a repurposed building, once a closed down family-run restaurant with attached living space, its owners had abandoned it and left the planet not too long ago. For now it served the Mandalorians as a base camp, giving them space and shelter, and... it seemed surprisingly clean and tidy, like an orderly military camp. There was a scent of food hanging in the air.

"I would have liked to fight beside you, Phroth, and Sholua, tonight, but my condition would be a detriment to us all. I still hope to do what I can before the fighting starts."

[Deonis Harik]

Deonis nodded looked her up and down assessing her visible injuries and listening. As he listened he nodded and found a spot to sit "Yes it is a shame would have loved to see you in action. Another time maybe. I am glad you are relatively fine. You live to fight another day."

"who did this to you?" asked looking at her injuries once again.

[Raven Cadera]

"The one who attacked my partner. He... hmmm... won. Faced me in single-combat and won. But he spared my life when I was out cold." It seemed to be something that was weighing on her mind.

Placing the kitten down in a chair to continue sleeping, Raven found herself a free seat next to it.

"In hindsight, I suppose I should've expected the outcome. That I'd lose."

[Deonis Harik]

"Even if you had known somehow that you would lose would it have changed anything? Would you have not fought him?" Deonis asked with a raise of his eyebrow ridge.

[Raven Cadera]

"Given the situation, yes, I still would have."

With some effort she shifted in her seat. "He separated me from the rest, and when I was by myself... he asked for us to settle it between us. In return, he asked that none of his companions be hurt, and I requested the same for my team and my family. We both agreed."

Her sigh was cautious, careful not to make her ribs hurt. "Could perhaps have lied, stalled for time until the others could get to where I was, or just said no and faced him and his friends at once... lying isn't something I do, and the latter option would have been really stupid. And... I didn't want to take the chance that my refusal meant that anyone else would get hurt. My life for everyone else's - there's no more honorable way to die."

"I just... don't know how to feel about being alive. I haven't failed, and the matter is over now. My family is alive and there will be no more threats from that direction. Why then do I feel like I've let everyone down?" The words conveyed that it did weigh heavily ok her, frustrating her as she tried to piece it together. It made her sound weary, rather than upset as there were no hints of any crying in her voice.

[Deonis Harik]

The big man leaned back "because you lost. You didn't fail, your goal achieved, threat dealt with, everyone safe. Like you said. But you still lost." He said bluntly "goal achieved or not being bested by another will never feel good. It will always make you question yourself as a warrior."

He took a breath "but don't focus on it. You have your family, your clan, and you still live. You live to grow. To take what lesson you can from the defeat and have it make you stronger. An honorable death is good but so long as you don't dishonor yourself living is still better so you can live an honorable life."

[Raven Cadera]

"..." Raven stared dumbfoundly at the crimson-skinned man, as if he had just pointed out to her that water is wet and she was just realising that now.

"I..." she sat up, leaning forward slightly with one arm resting against her knee, and the other hand coming up to touch her face. The slow movement of the injured arm wasn't enough to remind her of the pain this time. "... I think you just hit the nail on the head there, friend. I was just-- too blind to see it myself. Too caught up in trying to pick apart the individual pieces of my mind these past weeks, trying to see where I went wrong. When I should have been looking at the big picture, and what you just said."

She chuckled, giving him a brief smile. "That was very insightful of you. I wasn't... hmmm... no, you're still full of surprises. Every time I think I have you figured out, you surprise me still. But... thank you. I mean it."

[Deonis Harik]

"You're welcome." He says with a genuine warmth then Deonis smirks "I never claim to be a smart man. But smart people over think things. Sometimes you just need a simple point of view." He chuckles a little "As far as figuring me out let me know if you ever do. I don't quite know who I am most of the time. Just take it one day at a time and figure it out as I go."

"It's only fair I help you work through things when you've helped me. Even if you didn't mean to. Those words you spoke the second or first time we met about warriors fighting to achieve peace. Those stuck with me. I've meditated on them more than once. I think you're right. Fighting for peace, fighting to achieve it and protecting it are important."

He leaned back hanging his head back as he did "even within myself I have rarely been at peace. I have tried for it lately. Allowing myself to feel a calm. Enjoy where I am. Not worry about where I'm going. What will happen. Take moments of calm." Looked back at her and smiled "Thank you for that."

[Raven Cadera]

"Huh." She seemed genuinly surprised that her words had stuck with him that long. That it was something that had had such an impact on him.

"I almost don't know what to say." Raven chuckled warmly. "... Didn't know that it had stuck with you that much, but I'm honored. That my words has helped you in return. We're both warriors, you and I. But I think that one of the important things to keep in mind as warriors is that we have something worth fighting for, like peace, family, loved ones. Otherwise, we're just brutes and killers."

Well, they were that too, but still...

"It probably sounds odd to you though, to hear a Mandalorian speak of peace when we are a culture of warriors. Not that there haven't been peaceful Mandalorians, but that's a bit of a heavy topic. Suffice to say, some extreme measurements were taken to halt the civil wars that had damaged our people and homeworlds, and it was met with violent pushback. I'm sad to say that they are no more, but... I still think they had some right ideas. I don't think it was right to neglect our warrior-ways, to put away our armor and weapons, but I certainly agree with the goal to ensure that we had a future as a people." For a while, she seemed very thoughtful on the matter, before looking back at Deonis.

"Living in the moment then. Makes sense, you'll be heading into a fierce battle soon. No need to let the future dwell on you tonight, only the challenge that's ahead. Do you have all you need for the battle?"

[Deonis Harik]

"The best advice is usually given without trying I think. Just when you're being genuine." He listened to her tale of peaceful mandolorians and nodded "It seems difficult to take warriors and suddenly make them what? Farmers? Scientists? Janitors? There's nothing wrong with these jobs. Someone has to do them. They should be valued. But to take a Nexu and make it a house pet is both dangerous and cruel. still is a hunter. A predator. Goes against its nature. Warrior can be similar. Don't always need to fight but allow them to defend, to train, stay sharp."

He nodded when she asked about the fight "Indeed. Made some changes to my saber. Even deadlier now. Bought a enhancement system for my armor to make me stronger. Should be enough to deal with some troopers."

[Raven Cadera]

"It's a complicated topic for sure. Not that we don't have people who are scientists and farmers and the like, but before and after the New Mandalorians, everyone was expected to know how to fight. To defend themselves and their family. One of our strengths for thousands of years was that a village or town could easily band together as an army at a moment's notice, even if you thought there were only farmers, shookeepers and civilans there." Coming from the more country-bumpkin of the Mandalorian worlds, Raven was pretty used to the sight of people who seemed like farmers having traditional armor and weapons in their home.

"We wouldn't have lasted as long as we have if we didn't have people doing the normal stuff too." She gave a wink at that.

The talk of improving one's gear was some she understood well, even if she had no idea how a lightsaber could be improved. "Ah, that's a popular choice among us. My armor has a similar feature too. Nothing like feeling stronger while wearing armor... just took some time for me to get used to in the beginning, to be more aware of how fragile everything suddenly is."

[Deonis Harik]

He chuckled "sure, there must be a balance I think. Everyone being able to defend themselves just seems like a smart idea. I don't think I can understand pacifists. But that's no surprise with my upbringing." He had after all made his first kill before he was a teenager.

"I haven't done too much adjusting yet. But I won't mind if I'm accidentally too rough with a stormy." He says with an amused grin that has a touch of maybe cruelty? Maybe just that thirst for conflict that drove some warriors especially before a fight.

[Raven Cadera]

Perhaps they were both a little bit cruel, as Raven chuckled in response, a brief but devilish smile of her own. "Eh, those Imps get what's coming to them anyway. Mostly just bastards and assholes in the Empire's rank-and-file faceless goon-brigade. They don't even appriciate proper armor or fighting with honor."

She shook her head with some amusement. "I'd make a poor pacifist, I think. I'm too good at solving my problems with violence. But, well, as witnessed from my loss, I should probably get better at other solutions. Don't get me wrong though, I do enjoy peace and quiet, not having to look over my shoulder or worry about my family. But... I don't know, there's just a clarity in battle that I don't have elsewhere. There's nothing else but the fight, senses heightened for that moment alone."

[Deonis Harik]

he nodded "truly not warriors. At least any of the ones i've met. But enough of them in one place can pose some of a challenge. If only just." he chuckled a little

"Peace and quiet are something i've had to...adjust to. When I first left I wasn't used to just being alone with my thoughts for very long. Wasn't used to really thinking. not in any meaningful way. Time was always spent learning, or training, or observing. When I was alone at night I was too exhausted to really think. just slept. Definitely took awhile to learn how to just relax. Always felt like I should be doing something. If I wasn't tired and wasn't doing anything I felt lazy. Like I was wasting time."

[Raven Cadera]

"Beasts are also a challenge if there are enough of them," she said with a raised eyebrow, amused. "But no... I meant what I said yesterday that commander Talcik and her squad is perhaps the closest thing the Empire has to warriors. They seem to have more to them, than your average rank-and-file soldier."

Raven rubbed gently at her side, feeling the tenderness of her injuries there, but it alleviated it somewhat. "I know what you mean. I... my parents, and my brother, were killed when I was young. About ten years ago. By someone who betrayed our clan and family." It had become somewhat easier for her to speak of it, to find a distance between it and herself, now that she knew she didn't have to shoulder it alone. "I spent years on the run, on my own. Never trusting anyone, struggling to survive. So yeah, I totally get what you mean about not really sleeping, just passing out from exhaustion when you finally found a safe spot to rest."

She nodded, looking to him to meet his gaze. "It's a cruel galaxy out there."

[Deonis Harik]

Deonis nodded with a somber expression "Indeed it can be." He turned that somber expression to a warm smile toward Raven "All the more reason to try and make it better."

He looked around for a moment before settling back to her "We are both pretty lucky eh? Poodoo beginnings. Tragedy. Loss. Childhood stolen. But we ended up alright I'd say." He said with a slow breath in "you found a clan, friends, husband. I found purpose other than running and some friends as well. All things considered, not too bad."